Waiting

Waiting isn't what I thought it would be.

I'm not exactly sure what I had in mind.  Perhaps a peaceful reprieve compared to the crazy rush of getting paperwork and forms together.  Time to play with the kids, enjoy the weather, actually get back into living in the present with them....maybe some time to enjoy our current family as it is today, kind of like the last trimester of each of my pregnancies.

Alas, no such wait exists, at least not right now.

There's still much to do, and I'm still praying for balance in the midst of this journey.  I do believe that's what it's about for me right now.  Trying to stay in the present with our kids here and live in my heart with our future kiddos, praying for all of them and relishing the time we have right now, waiting on the Lord and trusting His timing and His plan.  The Lord is refining my character every day of this journey, and for that, I am thankful.

We completed our homestudy last week, submitted all of our forms, paperwork, letters, etc., and even turned in our completed dossier.  We wrote several checks-- paid for everything up to our referral, which means we've paid out over $11,000 thus far for this process.  Praising God for providing every cent and praising Him for what we trust will be His continued provision.

Essentially, there's nothing left for us to do on our side of this process (except PRAY.)  We've done our part, and now "we wait."

We wait on a phone call from our agency, matching us with a sibling group.  The call could come next week or next year; we just don't know... although we pray it's sooner than later.  We trust God's timing.  And we still don't know how many children!  So we trust that God, in His providential wisdom,  knows exactly what is best for our family and exactly which children in Ethiopia will be our forever children.

But I'm anxious.  Not in a worried kind of way.  More like you know you're about to get a really yummy treat and you can smell it baking, but you have to wait until it's completely cooked and cooled off before you can take a bite... that kind of anxious.  Excited, but kind of nervous that the treat might not be everything you've hoped it would be, or that it might even burn your mouth if you eat it too soon.

Have I mentioned that this waiting is NOTHING like I thought it would be??? It's just not easy, or peaceful... and it's only been a week!  My heart aches for those families who waited years, and for those families waiting now.

We continue our fundraising efforts... God has provided over $14,000 so far!  We are so grateful and thank Him daily for the people, provision and prayers that have been given on our family's behalf.  We are planning another few events and applying for grants and loans.  As it stands right now, we need another $26,000 to get our children home.  This doesn't scare us quite as much as the $40,000 did when we first began.  Because we know our God equips us for that which He calls us, and He has provided thus far. Truly, Ephesians 3:20-21 has been our lives for the past 4 months!

But when that call comes-- you know the one I referenced that could be next week or next year?-- well, when that call comes, we have ONE WEEK to accept the match and pay the fees associated with the referral.  As little as $14,200 or as much as $24,200, depending on how many children God has for us!  So we've upped our efforts, planning and selling and praying for ways to raise the money needed to get our children home.

You know, we had to see specialists to conceive Ella and Ava, and we have joked for years that Ava was our "most expensive child."  It's almost been a trophy in our house.  :-)  (Ella's 1 treatment was fully covered by insurance, but insurance didn't cover any of the 5 treatments we had before Ava was born.)  Obviously, we are overjoyed that we sacrificed at that time in our lives because now we have our sweet-spirited, precious Ava!  In much the same way, we sacrifice, but know with certainty that it will all be worth it when we get to meet our precious children!  And they'll most certainly be awarded the trophy for "most expensive!"

So we work, we wait, we pray, and we trust... Galations 6:7-10